1on1
I did 1on1s for years in tech teams.
I still do. Combined with systemic practice.
Hi, I'm Alex.
(they/them)
Neuroqueer (AuDHD). Non-binary.
Supervised systemic practitioner (DGSF).
15+ years building distributed systems on the BEAM.
Three burnouts. Still alive.
Who this is for
You're navigating confusing reality.
Frameworks don't quite.. work.
Things don't quite.. fit.
Neuroqueer reality.
AuDHD. Autism. ADHD. Meltdowns. Masking.
The gap between what You see
and what the world can hear.
(People call me distant.)
Complex family systems.
Divorce. Custody. Estrangement.
High-conflict dynamics.
Chosen family that holds more than blood ever did.
Identity weaponized in court or at the dinner table.
Systems that weren't built for your nervous system.
(And professionals who don't get how your brain actually works.)
Post-AI career upheaval.
"Engineer" was your identity. Now what?
The burnout was already there.
The layoff made it undeniable.
You don't need motivation.
You don't need someone to tell you what to do.
You need someone who sees the system you're in
and can sit with you in it.
What this is
A 1on1.
You and Me.
About your system.
Not therapy. Not life coaching.
Systemic practice — supervised, DGSF-certified.
You bring reality:
a custody negotiation, a career crisis,
a pattern you can't name.
I ask questions that help you surface your reality.
You leave with a clearer map of what's happening.
I don't fix you. There's nothing to fix.
I hold shared context while you decide.
What you share stays between us.
What happens
We talk. I observe.
I name what I see.
You decide what to do with it.
Typical rhythm: bi-weekly.
Video or voice. Your call.
In German or English.
No program. No curriculum.
One live system under real load: yours.
If I think you need something I can't offer,
I'll tell you.
Why me
I'm not observing your system from the outside.
I've been in it.
Neurodivergent kid who talked too much
to compensate for silence.
Queer in a system that wanted me legible.
Three burnouts. Systemic training.
Complex family system with lots of unresolved tension.
Every concept I work with
I learned in my body first.
If something here resonated —
you're probably already carrying load.
Send me an email.
Say as much or as little as you need. Or just say hello.
I'll respond within a few days. There will be a scheduling link. No commitment until you say so.
My hourly 1on1 rate is 150€.
I offer special rates to marginalized clients.
alex@systemic.engineer
LinkedIn